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| NEW DAWN: Bess Fraser still has good and bad weeks. |
AFTER two years in shared and emergency accommodation, Grantham flood victim Bess Fraser will finally move into her own home.
But the move is bittersweet for the woman who lost her sister Brenda Ross, nephew Joshua Ross and close friend Chris Face in the flash flood that ripped through the Lockyer Valley town in 2011.
"It's hard. I often get a bad case of the guilts because I survived," Ms Fraser said.
"I've finally got a place to call my own, but I'd give anything to have them back.
"I've built the house to the way I know Brenda and Joshy would have wanted ... and part of me hopes that one day when I open those doors they'll walk in.
"But I have to accept that's not going to happen."
Ms Fraser, 50, whose house was swept away, has had four homes in the past two years; a mixture of rooms offered by locals and a demountable erected by the Lockyer Valley Regional Council as emergency housing.
Her new home on Grantham's new hilltop estate is a relocated and remodelled bungalow donated by a Wynnum couple.
On the day the wall of water hit Grantham, Ms Fraser left home to move her car to higher ground, but by the time she tried to return "to do another load of washing" the main street was a torrent.
"I called Brenda and said, 'I'll see you in a couple of days, I love you, I'll catch ya,' " Ms Fraser said.
"I told Joshy I loved him and was so proud of everything he'd done ... I had to be strong, I didn't want him to be scared but I knew what was going to happen. We hung up and I called pretty much straight back every number I had. But they'd gone. It was minutes."
While the bodies of Brenda, 56, and Joshua, 25, were found days later, that of Mr Face, 63, has never been recovered. Ms Fraser said while the grief lessened with time, she still struggled with the horror of the tragedy, often had problems sleeping and has had to have counselling.
"It's still pretty raw. Last week I was in bed every day. I call them my doona days or lounge days, where I turn everything off and just try to get away from it all. I've had counselling and had problems with medication where I've ended up admitted for psychiatric treatment in Ipswich. I get carted off there now and then because it gets too much. But overall it does get easier."
Ms Fraser plans to create a memorial garden using some bricks from Joshua's former home, and have an outdoor table built from floorboards salvaged from the home.
www.CourierMail.com.au
11.1.13
